Shorts and a Plan
by Loser142
Summary: Where Dave pulls a prank on Karkat and it backfires. Homestuck. Davekat. Humanstuck. Oneshot! Boy x Boy. Deal with it. Rated T for swearing? idk qvq Be warned, i haven't written a fic in 3 years ;;v;; hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I'm so nervous ahhhh
Idea/summary: Humanstuck AU. Karkat is the lonely, grumpy, mysterious kid who avoids everyone. (Age: Karkat: 16. Dave: 17) Dave is a rude, snarky, cool guy. Who is openly gay. His friend terezi dares him to pull a prank on karkat, just a small one. (Prank?: Replace his pants with booty shorts in the guys locker room) Which gets karkat a lot of attention, then Dave gets jelly because yes. Dave's POV? kinda? idk.

Your name is Dave Strider. And you are well known throughout this school. Your known as the cool kid, which i mean, who wouldn't think that? Your fucking rad and they know it. It gets kinda boring tho, and thank the fucking heavens for Terezi, she decided to challenge you with a little dare. Nothing too harmless, just a little clothing swap from the loner kid in your math class. All you have got to do. Is swap out his pants for shorts in the boys locker room.

You slowly sneak up to his locker, shorts in you hand, a huge grin plastered on your face as you skillfully pick the lock. You look around to make sure no one is coming before taking his pants and shoving the shorts in there. This guy wears the baggiest clothes, this pants look 2 sizes too big and his sweater looks like its a size too big as well, He looks like a toothpick so you kinda wonder why his clothes are so big...eh oh well. You shrug as you gently close the locker and sneak out to hide, waiting to see his reaction. What did terezi say his name was again? Car Cat? Fuckin weird.

You hear light footsteps padding into the room, definitelythis Karkat guy strolling in, he cant see you as you made sure to stay out of sight. You watch him open up his locker, and because your a fuckin gentleman you look away while he gets dressed. After about 2 minutes have passed you hear a soft grumble then a small bang. You peek over there and his head is against the locker, the shorts in his hand.

"For fucks sake..." He mumbles irritably, you resist the snicker bubbling in your chest. You almost think that hes gonna stay in here but sure enough, he pulls the shorts on, and sweet Jesus you don't think you have ever seen an ass so fine in your life, because you can feel the heat rushing to your face. God. Damn. The shorts were covering less than half of his thighs, and they sculpted his ass perfectly. Welp, so much for the kid being a stick, he has, the nicest curves, guys should not be aloud to look that fucking cute, no karkat isn't aloud to, what the hell.

You watch as he walks out, prepared to play volleyball with everyone else in the gym, despite his size (what 5? 5'2? You don't know but man is he short) he's rather good at sports, not the best, but good. You follow him in there, you had already gotten into your gym clothes so you just go. And as soon as he walks out, almost everyone's eyes are on him, and those perfect legs of his, which he chooses to ignore, but you can see his ears starting to turn pink.

The entire time the game goes on, lots of eyes are on that ass of his, it jiggles in the most perfect way, and you cant help but stare from the corner of your eye, not that anyone can tell of course with these rad as hell shades of yours on. Karkat honestly doesnt seem to notice, he just plays like he always does, you had expected this to be funnier, but now your starting to think that terezi tricked you...she did this on purpose...damnit. As soon as the break starts(Thiers a break in the middle of PE so everyone can get some water or streatch n' shit) you stride (snorts) over to terezi. She knoiws your coming, she claims she can smell you from a mile away, but she has a snarky ass grin on her face as you approach her.

"You did this on purpose." You say flatly, a bit of bite in your tone.

"Oh but whatever do you mean Cool Kid? Are you accusing me of something?" She says before gasping dramatically.

"You know exactly what i mean Pyrope" You jay, pointing a finger at her, even if she cant see it, its for effect. As soon as you finish talking Karkat walks up next to you. Your confused at first on why hes over here, you almost freak out because you think that he knows, but his attention is directed at Terezi.

"Hey, can i borrow some water Tez?" He says, of course, with that grumpy attitude that sticks to him like fly paper.

"Sure Karkles! But only if i get a please!" She says happily, her eyes strained on you with a more mischievous grin on her face. She knows him. She FUCKING knows him. Yep thats it. Your gonna kill a blind chick. Here lies Terezi Pyrope. Blind bitches be trippin.

"Please?" He says dramatically, sarcasm dripping from his lips. She seems to be pleased with this because she shoves her water bottle his way, he mutters a quick thanks before guzzling some down. He hands it back to her, giving you a glance before he walks back to his spot.

"I hate you." You cross your arms

"Love ya too Dave! Now shoo, go play with your booooyyyfriiiend" she snickers as she shoves you away. You huff loudly before going back to your spot as well.

The rest of the Physical E. period is agonizing, you swear if you didn't have so much control, you would have the largest boner right now. And got are you luck for these shades, your face if probably as red as a motherfucking apple right now. When PE ends you drag your ass to the showers only to see Karkat sitting on the bench with his face in his hands. Shit is he okay or? You start to approach him before you hear him let out the most intense and vulgar string of curses you have ever heard, well then, hes got quite the mouth on him, you definitely weren't expecting that.

"Uh...you alright?" You say, kinda quietly because your not sure if you wanna startle the little ball of rage before you.

"Fuck off asshat. Where are my pants?" He yells as he turns around to face you. Your brows raise as you look at him.

"What?" You say.

"Where. are. my. pants." He says loudly, irritation booming from his voice.

"Terezi told you?!" you shout.

"No! I'm not fucking stupid! I saw you following me out of the shower numb nuts! Just give em back!" he growls. For fucks sake, and you were stealthy as fuck before that.

You huff before taking his pants out of your locker and handing them to him. Your eyes still trained on those god damn legs. Jesus Christ, plan backfired much? You watch as he pulls the pants over his shorts. He looks up at you with a shit eating grin on his face.

"Terezi and i were just Trying to get you to pop a boner in class. Ill have to try harder next time" He shrugs as he walks out, rather proud of himself.

And you just...stand there...mouth agape, eyes wide. You raise your hand, ready to say something, a comment, a joke, an angry rant, but nothing comes out. For the first time in your life, your speechless. Thats it. Your burning all of TZ's dragon plushies. After you get her to give Karkats number to you of course.


End file.
